I have to dig deeper, search harder for some sort of inner strength, a truth that I know but can’t remember.
It’s a painful journey. It hurts because you begin to realise you are not who you thought you were. That pristine image you had in your head was just an illusion. You’re looking into your metaphorical mirror and what you see is quite ugly, weak, pitiful.
You’ve read about this so-called journey, heard about it, in books, on the telly, in the movies, in music, in casual conversations over coffee.
But now you’re starting to see it. Not only see it but experience it. That wretchedness that comes with a fall. Your lowliness, the gaps - oh God, the gaps! - in your very being. The disconnect between your goals and your reality. Perhaps realising you don’t really have any solid goals to begin with. You’re kinda coasting along, not quite present in the moment, just vaguely living in the watery near-future.
It seems bleak but you know that it will pass. It has to because nothing lasts. It’s not even about good days or bad days. They are just days.
The knowledge of love is coming. Be patient. Work hard but be patient.
"I’ll tell you what is harder than dying in Gaza by an Israeli missile deluxe. What is harder is that you get a phone call from the Israeli army telling you toevacuate your home because it will be bombed in ten minutes. Imagine; ten minutes; and your whole short history on the…
"…and you leave your home to die a thousand times, or refuse to leave and die once."
“Sometimes I think it’s rather odd the way we have dropped “I” from elements of our conversation when talking about ourselves. “I love you,” “I miss you” have been transformed into “Love you” and “Miss you.” Makes me wonder if the latter is a product of a mind that is apprehensive of commitment. It’s easier to charge some elusive entity with the task of loving another than actually doing the loving. Outsourcing our emotions. In turn it makes it easier for us to claim love for people we don’t actually love and longing for people we may not truly long for because at the end of the day I never said “I loved you,” but rather “Love you.” Unless, of course, we’re expressing some sort of annihilation in the love that no longer sees the self but only sees the love and the beloved. But this I doubt.”—@Faatimahknight (via nuriddeenknight)
Protect your happiness - Energies are contagious. Don’t waste yours on someone who’s trying to drain it. Exert your energy into people who are capable of reciprocating it. Life is too short to be putting your happiness at risk for ANYONE. Guard your happy and always be on standby because there is going to be someone there trying to steal it. Protect your heart - Invest your love into someone just as passionate about it as you. Give love to everyone, but give your heart to only ONE who is deserving. There are enough things in this world to half-ass, love should never be one of them.
You are young and you are green. Forgive yourself.
Seeds sit in darkness before they split. The violent tear spreads open and the new shoot climbs upwards, seeking light. It pushes slowly, silently through the heavy earth. Meanwhile roots burrow deeper into oblivion, seeking water and strength.
Downwards and upwards; darkness and light; but all expansion, growth.
For those of you in difficulty, may Allah grant you ease; for those in sickness, may He grant you recovery; for those in happiness, may He complete your happiness; for those broken-hearted, may He give you Himself.
I pray Allah grants us each a spiritual qeunching this coming Ramadan (and beyond).
Genuinely can’t believe how the time has flown by.